Now, I'm not going to lie: I've experienced my fair share of parental competitiveness by this point. Those pangs of jealousy when someone posts a video to Facebook of their kid doing something yours has yet to master. The cutest kid Christmas card wars. The unspoken whose-first-birthday-party-has-a-better-candy-table-with-apothecary-jars rivalry.
But nothing could prepare me for the beast that was awoken inside me when, after touring a preschool I had scouted for the fall, I was told, "there are only five spots left for Holden's age level." Arrive to the Open House exactly when it begins at 6pm and head right to the registration table, you suggest? Challenge accepted.
Allow me to backtrack: I've been interested in enrolling Holden in a 2-year-old preschool program, a relatively rare find, for some time. With her spending all day, every day with my parents, I want her to attend preschool mostly for the social interaction, but also honestly because I don't entirely trust my own ability to properly teach her the fundamentals and want to make sure I have some legit, certified backup.
I never would have imagined that you have to enroll your kid for the fall in January. Luckily, on a whim, I texted a friend whose daughters attend the school and randomly asked if she knew when I could register. Oh, hi, it was in two weeks at their Open House. Holden and I scheduled a tour when I was home last week and she was able to sit in on a class and make a polar bear out of a paper plate and dance and read books and eat snacks and learn about the letter "S" and play dress up and do the "Going on a Bear Hunt" song. We loved it.
And that's when I was told I'd have to fight for her spot. And fight I would. I was prepared to go Hunger-Games-style on these moms. And obviously I live-tweeted the experience.
So, to be honest, it ended up being an entirely drama-free occurrence. We're in, we got our desired time slot, no one got shivved. But dammit, if I wasn't ready to take it to the mat for my kid. I mean, look at this awesome polar bear. This raw talent clearly must be nurtured.